WINNERS AND LOSERS:WEEK 2

Hi guys!!

On today's winners and losers, I will be reminding you that Nigeria doesn't care for you, so lets all find every opportunity to live the Nigerian dream.

Just in case you are not aware, the Nigerian dream is to move to Canada and allow cold kill you, better to die in snow than without light.

That is why these 'I am a King in my country' people make me chuckle. What is this royalty you speak of? What is glorious about a 56 year old baby? Don't sell me that 'Nigeria has potential' dream.
Not today, Satan.

Nigeria shocks you back to reality, you go to church on Sunday and your pastor makes you feel like the world revolves around your bumbum, he tells you how God thinks you are the best thing since red velvet. Service ends and you witness your first hit and run, then you are trying to reconcile what was said on the pulpit to what you just saw. It doesn't add up.

That's why Eric Arubayi's death pained me a lot. I didn't know that young man, but nobody can tell me that was God's plan. He died because of someones greed. In a sane society, someone would have been dragged to court. What am I even saying? In a sane society, this will not happen, because companies will rather do the right thing than pay compensation fees.
But in this shit hole, someone bribed his way to bring in fake drugs and someone has died and because we are a people that leave things to God and forbid all bad omens, this will repeat itself.
We know this story because its Eric, what about the people who have lost their lives and we don't know their stories because the spotlight is not on them?
May the dead rest.

Today's losers are:

1. Nigeria

For constantly letting her citizens down. Because of Eric, because God had no hand in this. Because we do not realise the urgency of a system that works.

2. Andrew Yakubu

If you missed the story, I will summarise it. Andrew Yakubu stole money and built a house for it and put it in a fireproof safe and put it in an air conditioned room. Is that not madness? Its one thing to take our money and put in a Swiss bank but to build a house for it in the place you took the money from is quite bold. I used quite wrongly. That was very bold.
That's quite audacious. Dude was too sure our crappy laws will not reach him.

3. Reno Omokri:

Nothing annoys me like people who are obsessed with sex, relationships in a third world country. You don't have basic electricity, people are dying because of fake drugs, our education curriculum is a mess but a woman's vagina and sexuality is what you have chosen to get a headache for. Pray, tell, why have you decided to be vacuous.

Let me get to the gist, Reno drops his wisdom nuggets once a week and I think he should stop, This week's nugget got under the people's skin, he swore he was promoting chastity, but you see everyone was tired. We know how the conversation for chastity starts, the speaker swears he is talking to both men and women, but we know how it ends, women end up at the receiving end.
But we were not

via GIPHY

If you want to preach chastity, by all means take over the pulpit, but you will not objectify women and describe them as products with broken seals.
Why are men so obsessed with women and their orifices? Why are their so many thought pieces on how women should live their lives? Please face the thing between your legs.

4. James Ibori and his Deltans:

It takes a level of madness to see the person who robbed you and still give them a standing ovation.
It also takes a level of boldness to be caught in the act and you have the nerves to play word pun.

I was arrested for money laundering. I am not a thief- James Ibori, 2017

What I don't get are the people who support him and say at least, he built the road to his village, even if he stole.
How do I say it? He had no business touching that money, I don't care that he gave everyone in your family scholarship to study Agric Economics.
We need to stop justifying theft by public office holders, they have no business touching the state or country's money.
For crying out loud, these people are paid way too much!!
These people don't care for us, we need to stop making excuses for them.

5. The Nigerian Police

Audu Maikori was picked up for making 'inciting comments' on social media. He later claimed that the information he spread was false and he apologised.
But I have questions, why is the Nigerian police so quick to pick up Audu but they have not been able to arrest these terrorists that claim to be herdsmen. Why?
But you chattered plane ticket to carry Audu to Abuja from Lagos.
Let me just leave this matter like salad.
The good news is that he has been released, so thank God for the gift that is socil media.

Because some people still have sense and we must not allow the people mentioned above to block their shine

1. Professor Yemi Osinbajo

PYO is that temp who takes over the job for a while and becomes the superstar and HR is wondering why have we not made him a full time staff? As we are all aware the President has left the country because of health issues and PYO is just busy earning his pay, he got to time to die.
He has visited more states that Oga has done in 2 years. I want to
But now that I think of it, the bar has been set so low that an Acting President doing Ajala work is what we are hailing.
But still, well done sir.

2. Adele:

Because its not every time that you win album of the year.

3. Beyonce

Because she is the real mama d mama, because she is nobody's mate.
The end.

4. The people at #SanitaryAidForNigerianGirls

Beginning of the year, the price of sanitary pads went high and there was the argument of distributing sanitary pads for free as women don't have control over menstration as against distributing condoms for free.

As this discussion was happening, Nigerians exposed their ignorance. Do you know someone said since pad was too expensive, why don't we take tissues or clothing materials as an alternative?

I am not even making this up, that legit dropped out of someone's mouth and he was very bold about it. Nothing puts me off balance like audacity with a touch of ignorance.

It was for this reason that this initiative kicked off, alot of persons donated to the cause and during the week their representatives went to a school at Ijora to distribute the items and the were also sensitized.

I just felt that was amazing and such initiatives such be encouraged.

Okay guys, I will drop my pen in this basket of love (I promise you that line was not because of Valentine)